how much is that bronco in the yard woof woof

ahhhhhhh meh.. the past few days have been meh. went on a shooting spree at the gun range yesterday, i prolly shot 100 rds of 7.62x54r. then i came home and slept...i slept from 230pm yesterday until 930am this morning. wow. started new meds again on friday...i feel *something* when i take them...be that good or bad. as soon as i woke up this morning i worked on switching the wheels from the bronco on to the van. that was an all day affair in the heat...ugh. when i had them switched over i took the bronco for a ride, i went to advance auto, then to dunken for a lemonaid coolatta, to the gas station for 10 bucks in gas and car wash for the bronco. it was interesting to wash the bronco with no back glass in the automatic carwash. jens dad also cooked out today. he made sasuages and hamburgers which were great. now im laying here in bed all clean and cold being meh.

standing in the shadows at the end of the bed...

will the girl in the yellow shirt and black shorts in my dream plz come over. thanks

no no no

work is becoming stressfull again. i was all over today training people who didnt want to be trained. bleh. no no no. i dont really have much to talk about. other then the same old emo shit about being lonely.

i got a 50 buck gift card from work for good qa...then proceeded to get like 20 coaching sheets. i felt like such a failure, i almost felt like throwing the giftcard away and tearing up the certificate stating im awesome, because honestly im not. im just a misrable fat fuck who cant do anything right. my trucks broken, my job makes me feel like even more of a loser, i dont have any friends. why havent i killed myself yet? oh thats right, because im a loser. *grabs gun and ammo*

bleh

*curls up and cries*

at least i have "dad" pork roll sammiches. *munch munch*

maybe you sleep well in your head

things have come apart at the seams. when will the paxil start working? when will i return to my former medicated self? can i ever get over this self loathing? i need someone now more then ever, but all i have is a disinterested cat. someone help me, please?

how lame is this, im blogging from work.