UNEEDMEMORETHANINEEDU

i dont know why im fighting going to sleep, but i am. i dont know.

IDK

OH YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

why does this make me feel like a little girl?

when i look out there it makes me glad i’m not you

yea it sucks, did i figure it would be any different? meh. meh. meh. meh. meh. meh. meh. meh. meh. meh. meh. meh. meh. meh. meh. meh. meh. meh. meh.


i dont like being angry, and it seems the only person who can make me angry is jen.

no, i don't

I don't know if I really like where any of this is going.

Sympathetic ear

Sometimes I wish I had someone here for me. I'm more alone then I've ever been in my life. I don't have highschool pals around the block or sisters in another county. I have myself. Sometimes myself doesn't give the best advice , sometimes myself doesn't listen to its self. So I sit here alone. Its hard being odd man out.

last night i turned around and i thought i saw the world ending

its so dead and depressing here.

Christmas recap

2000 was okay I still had a post chicago high
2001 jen and her stupid zwan ideas made things suck. Last christmas with my mom
2002 was okay last christmas spent with my father
2003 first christmas I didn't spend with my family
2004 glad to have the mess in texas with my father over
2005 jen decided she didn't love me anymore
2006 the first christmas I ever worked
2007 first christmas without jens mother second working christmas. More pain and sorrow. Eff you christ

Lets join in the last hurrah

So how do I feel. I feel meh. I haven't taken my lexapro in like three months. I don't feel great but I don't feel bad. I don't get overly nervous or worry to much. I still have lonely spells, and wish I had a companion sometimes. Christmas this year is going blow just like the last few christmases. Oh well they said don't think theres tacos to be had

Appliances have gone berserk
I cannot keep up
Treading on people's toes
Snot-nosed little punk

And I can't face the evening straight
You can't offer me escape
Houses move and houses speak
If you take me there you'll get relief
relief, relief, relief, relief...

And if I wanna talk
I just wanna talk
Please don't interrupt
Just sit back and listen

Cause I can't face the evening straight
You can't offer me escape
Houses move and houses speak
If you take me there you'll get relief
relief, relief, relief, relief...

It's too much
Too bright
Too powerful

Too much
Too bright
Too powerful

Too much
Too bright
Too powerful

its the stream of the motion blur

so yeah, i hinted that someone died in my last post. well it was jens mother, which im sure anyone who reads this pathetic blog already knows anyways. everythings a mess at the moment, i dont know how things are going to go. life for everyone is either going to go on or fall apart spectacularly.

we're all getting so tired of you
the things you say
the things you do
but please just follow your great plan thru
we've all had it
we've had it
we've had it with you