i should have called off work today like i was thinking about this morning. instead i got caught reading my email, the team lead wasnt pleased and stormed off. i figure he went to manpower, and i figure i'll get a stern finger pointing tomorrow. it wouldnt be so bad, but once we finish our offline work, theres never anything to do. i browse the wikipedia or read my mail because i've finished all my work, and im not getting any calls, what am i supposed to do? gah

I hate the times when I really want to talk to someone theres never anyone to talk to.

my geek books

Tanks vaginas and being late for work.

So this dream I was having...first I was getting ready for work. Then I remember walking across the street when a tank turned onto it...then a military parade..wtf? It was like your typical soviet era show of force parade. Then I ran back home...to find joey there. We went inside and started watching the news..on the news they were having a story on girls getting cosmetic surgery on their vaginas?! We were enamored. Eh?

I wanna do so many thing but I feel I just wouldn't fit in or something. I found myself flustered by the fact that a girl was actively talking to me about random geeky crap. My eyes were watering. It was totally weird. I need to get laid.

I had a dream about a girl with small firm breasts.

I wanted to go clothes shopping today with jen, and look for a chair while we were out. I also wanted to go to the gun range. Now I feel like im the odd man out

In my dreams girls use balloons as dildos. Plz make sense of this.

BALLOONS!!

I like how my biggest blog post ever is a bunch of rambling nonsense

i am the worlds best christian

i dont like people who flaunt their religion. i've noticed a lot of people who i went to school with who proclaim on their myspaces that they're proud christians, and how they're getting into heaven while the rest of us are stuck in hell on earth or some other nonsense. i understand religion can help people cope with somethings, like say a love one dying, or maybe even giving someone a sense of worth. but why mark yourself as 100% christian christ is my life omgwtfbbq 3:16 forever!1 people like my mother, john-paul, or even jens dad dont put omfgeeesus died 4 my sinz bumper stickers on their car and they're fairly spiritual.

then again maybe this is a southern thing, cause those rebs love the jesus. i dont even really know what the point of this rant was anymore. maybe im sad i dont have anything to belive in...no i dont think thats it. sarcasim i couldnt believe in a god who took my parents away from me at such a young age /sarcasim.



maybe i'll turn into a god fearing american and dislike japanese cars, because they were shooting at me in veitnam in '76. speaking of my racist lying coworker, we were talking about guns today and i was showing him pictures of some of my guns and he was pointing out that he liked the trigger guard on one of them and that more guns need one like. based on this statement, i can fully say this man did not fight in veitnam, and he has more then likely never held a gun or touched a women in his life.

remember, i like you no matter what they say.

i got a shelf for my room. now all i need is a bed, chair, and tv stand.







gratuitous gun pictures

dreams dreams dreams

tmi

This "diet" has my bm's all fucked up. I feel like im ripping my ass open every time I poo. Its hard knobby and round.

I try not to stroll down memory lane too often. but I am a sappy person like everyone else, its just my memories are often painful. They're filled with people who are no longer in my life for whatever reason. Be it death, beAtings whatever. Its like with the rifle we bought saturday. I didn't want it because I wanted a new gun, I wanted it because I remember going to this gun shop with my dad. This guy had several of them (krags) I thought they looked so freaking cool with the door on the side of them. I would ogle them while my dad talked guns with the owner.

My dad and i didn't race together, like him and my sister. We shot guns and liked looking at neat old rifles.

sniff

new shooty thing

y halo thar mr krag

i didnt feel very well today. i think it was a combination of starving myself, caffine withdrawl, an uncomfortable bed, sores that dont seem to be healing, bad phone calls, and downright depression.

im depressed and lonely

work sucks, its not stressful, its just boring and slow.

im fat, other then the obvious problems that come with being fat, i have some other issues that are bothering me

gah i want to wake up someone else.